It’s easy to feel like your puppy hates you when she seems to spend all day destroying your stuff and hurting you (both physically and emotionally!)
But your puppy does not hate you.
And there are lots of things you can do to build a better bond between you.
My Puppy Hates Me
Are you being bitten to shreds? Does your puppy cringe when you come near him? Or ignore your commands and please for him not to mess on the rug?
You are not alone.
But there is lots you can do to help get your life back under control again.
And the cause of these issues is no reflection on how your puppy feels about you.
The most common reasons for an owner to feel like their puppy hates them include:
- Biting
- Growling and yapping
- Messing in the house
- Running away from you
- Preferring another member of the family
Biting
Before your puppy came home you might have heard that they bite, but didn’t really realise the extent of the problem.
Puppies’ biting can feel like an all out aggressive attack.
You try to hug them, they bite your fingers.
Attempt to walk past them, they savage your toes.
Give them a pet, find them hanging onto your arm.
It’s really frustrating, painful and hurtful too.
But your puppy has no idea you don’t like their toothy attention.
They aren’t doing it because they’ve got something against you.
Quite the opposite actually, they are having a really fun time in your presence. And sadly sinking their teeth into you is all part of that.
Fortunately, there are plenty of things you can do to help with puppy biting:
- How to stop your puppy biting
- Stopping your puppy biting kids
- How to stop your puppy biting your clothes
Puppy Growling and Yapping
Puppies make some really ferocious noises when they play.
And as a new owner it’s not always easy to see the cause of their growling.
If your puppy is chewing their toy, you look at them and they growl, it can seem like a threat.
Especially if they then carry their toy onto your foot, keep chewing and continue to growl.
(Which incidentally is exactly what my puppy is doing as I type this…)
But don’t panic, you haven’t invited a tiny monster into your home.
This growl in young puppies is an invitation to play.
You don’t want to respond to it and encourage their already heightened excitement, but you don’t need to worry about it either.
And it certainly isn’t a sign that your puppy hates you.
Mostly small puppy growls and yaps are simply a result of over excitement.
They can be avoided by only playing with your puppy in short bursts, and always stopping the game when they take it too far.
Messing in the House
Puppy potty training is a process that every new puppy owner has to go through, and it can take a lot out of you. Emotionally and physically!
The important thing to remember is that puppies never, ever, ever poop or pee indoors to cause you stress or annoyance.
They do it because they need to go there and then, and haven’t yet learned not to.
If you punish mistakes they happen more often, because the pup doesn’t understand that you are cross about the location. Only that you are angry about the poop or pee! So they go somewhere you can’t see to do it.
Which is obviously totally the opposite of what you want.
If you are struggling with potty training your puppy then check out these helpful guides, or sign up to our comprehensive online Puppy Parenting course.
- When to start potty training a puppy
- Potty training a puppy when you work full time
- Puppy potty training regression
- Complete guide to potty training your puppy
Puppy Running Away
Puppies normally want to stay together, especially during the first few weeks at home.
But once they find their feet and feel more settled, they will often boldly go further away if they don’t have motivation to stay close.
This is not because your puppy hates you and wants to get as far away from you as possible.
It’s just because there is a fun wide world to explore.
To help keep your puppy close, make sure that every time they check in that you have a very tasty treat for them.
And keep changing direction.
Don’t let your route be predictable, keep them guessing!
And remember that puppies don’t need much formal exercise, and do really well with some socialization and plenty of training sessions.
Preferring Another Member of the Family
This is a hard one to stomach.
But fortunately, their stomach is what dogs are led by.
If your puppy is showing a strong preference for another member of the family this simply won’t last if you are the one that trains them.
The bond formed by positive reinforcement training is incredibly strong, and will filter into general family life really quickly.
You can begin with lots of short, sweet Puppy Games in the kitchen with them, and as they grow move onto more formal training.
But every time you work together with reward based training, that bond between you will grow.
And in the meantime be reassured that just because right now your puppy is more keen to climb into your partner’s lap than yours, doesn’t mean they hate you or dislike you at all.
Puppies’ Don’t Hate
There are lots of things that young puppies do which are frustrating and even upsetting.
They break your stuff, pee on your floor and even hurt you.
But none of these actions mean anything when it comes to the emotional.
Stay calm, keep training and your puppy will soon become a strongly bonded member of the family.
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